Protecting My New Life
I had to separate myself from old influences that were not good for me. Not everybody liked it. Not everybody understood it. But I had to do it for me
But when the crowd was put outside, He went in and took her by the hand, and the girl arose. Matthew 9:25
I often say that I love finding recovery principles in the Bible. The truth is, they are really biblical principles that recovery uses. I just see them from a recovery perspective now. There is a story about Jesus raising a little girl from the dead that reminds me of this. Jairus came to Jesus asking Him to heal his daughter. On the way to the house, word came that she had died. Jesus continued on, but He only allowed Peter, James, and John to go with Him. When He arrived at the house, people were crying, mourning, and wailing. Jesus told them the girl was not dead but sleeping, and they laughed at Him and ridiculed Him. That means they dismissed, belittled, and minimized Him and what He said. So He put them all out. Everybody except the girl’s mother and father and the three disciples had to leave. These were not just random people standing around. This was Jairus’ home. Family, friends, and important people in their lives were there, and Jesus still put them all outside. I don’t think they were happy about being put outside, and they probably didn’t understand why He did it either.
There have been times in my recovery when I have had to do something very similar. I have had to remove myself from people, places, situations, and influences that were not healthy for me. Some of those changes were drastic, but I did not want to stay anywhere close to the life I had been living. I wanted to get so far away from it that going back would not even be an option. Drastic times required drastic measures. I changed where I went. I changed who I spent time with. I stopped doing things that connected me to my former life. Instead, I surrounded myself with people who wanted to walk this new path with me, people like my sponsor, accountability partners, and other people I’ve met in the rooms of recovery. They encouraged me, challenged me, and helped me keep moving forward. And I was able to help them too. For me, I could no longer allow anyone or anything to pull me back toward my former life. A life I no longer wanted to live. Not everybody got to come with me, and I needed to put some people out too. Not everybody liked it or even understood it. But I was doing this for me.
And I have reaped the benefit of those decisions. My environment changed. My thinking changed. My relationships changed. The life I had known before began to disappear. In many ways, it died. And something new began to live. That is what I see when I read this story today. Jesus knew what He was about to do, and He was very selective about who was allowed to go with Him and who was allowed in the room. I have learned that I need to be selective too. There are people and influences that strengthen my faith, my recovery, and my life with God, and there are others that could pull me back toward my former life. I have a responsibility to guard what God is doing in my life. I take that seriously. And I have never looked back.
Reflection
Are there people, places, or influences in my life that continue to pull me toward a life I no longer want?
