Serenity Prayer

A Guided Prayer Meditation

Serenity Prayer is not just words I repeat in meetings. It is more than that. It has become a new way of thinking, practicing surrender, and living my life each day. This is how I practice it in real life. I use the full prayer.

God,

God is the source of my help, not me. I need help from a power greater than me. (Step 1) He is God and I am not.

Grant me the Serenity

I need peace and sanity in my life and I cannot get it by myself or I would already possess it. I am insane. I have crazy thinking. Things either now are or will get chaotic beyond my control.

To accept the things I cannot change.

My challenge is acceptance. Acceptance is the answer to all of my problems today. I cannot change things no matter how much I think I might be able to.

The courage to change the things I can,

Change is not easy. It is actually very hard. That is why it takes courage, courage which I do not possess on my own. I need God to give me courage. After I accept whatever it is that I can change, then I need to confront it with God’s help.

And the wisdom to know the difference.

I need God’s wisdom to help me know what I have control over and what I do not. The wisdom to know what I need to change and what I cannot change.

Living one day at a time,

It helps me to take things in small chunks. “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.” Confucius. I can do something for a few hours that I would not be able to do if I thought I had to do it for the rest of my life.

Enjoying one moment at a time;

I need God’s help to enjoy life, to stop and smell the roses. I mean literally stop while I am walking and bend over and smell the flowers. Not just figurative talk. I need to enjoy life and not be so negative.

Accepting hardship as a pathway to peace;

I do not like this part of the prayer. I do not want any hardship at all. Ever. But that is unrealistic thinking and it sets me up for future resentments. So I ask God to help me accept hardship and then ask Him to show me a pathway toward peace in the midst of it.

Taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is;

This tells me that Jesus practiced acceptance too. He lived and operated in this sinful world and as it was. He did God’s will in the midst of chaos and evil.

Not as I would have it;

He did not insist that everyone do it His way, even though His way was God’s way. He allowed people to make their own choices. He accepted and loved them anyway, even though they did things against God’s will and His plan. I need to release my demand that others live according to my expectations.

Trusting

I ask God to help me trust. Sometimes trusting Him is easy and sometimes trusting Him is very hard. The man in the Bible said, “Lord I believe; help my unbelief.” (Mark 9:24). After I learn to trust God, it becomes easier to start trusting others. Something I never did before recovery.

That You will make all things right

I can trust that He cares about me and for me. He is a loving, caring God who will bring good and make wrong things right if I surrender to Him and His will.

If I surrender to Your will;

Surrender is the key. I need to raise the white flag and surrender to God and to His will, holding up both hands in a humble posture.

So that I may be reasonably happy in this life

Happiness is a choice. Some say happiness is temporary but joy is eternal. I believe I can be reasonably happy, and many times very happy, in this life while still living in lasting joy.

And supremely happy with You forever in the next.

Nothing gives more peace than knowing my eternal destiny is secure. That at the end of my life here on earth, I will go to heaven and be with Him forever.

AMEN

Amen means so be it. Let it happen. Or as I have heard in meetings, Let it begin with me.

God Met Me In My Mess

The Moment I Stopped Trying to Earn God’s Love

Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need. Hebrews 4:16

I felt trapped in a vicious cycle that I couldn’t escape. No matter how hard I tried, I kept repeating the same destructive behaviors. I would pray and plead, “God, please take this urge away,” but the moment of relief never lasted. Like the proverb says, I kept returning to my own vomit. Each time I failed, the shame grew heavier until I started to believe that maybe this was just who I was now. I felt hopeless, discouraged, and distant from God. How could He possibly take me back again? I knew better, and that made it worse. I loved God deeply, but I was too embarrassed to pray. I repented, but I still carried guilt like a permanent scar. Even when I did pray, I found myself begging for forgiveness over and over, as if His mercy depended on how sorry I felt. Though I knew in my head that He promised forgiveness, I didn’t believe it enough to feel it in my heart. Slowly, without even realizing it, I stopped praying altogether.

Through recovery, something began to change. At every meeting, we prayed, once to open and once to close. So that meant I prayed. I was praying again. The prayers were familiar and I recognized the words, but now they seemed more real to me. I had a spiritual awakening, realizing that even simple, common prayers carry deep meaning when spoken from the heart. God reached me there, taking the little bit I had to give and welcomed me. He didn’t reject me or chastise me for not doing it better. He just accepted me as I was, and He came to meet me right there. I started to feel like I was getting to know God, not just about Him.

My relationship with God began to deepen, and prayer was becoming a conversation. I laid down my facade and was finally being honest. I could talk to Him about anything and everything. I started having discussions with God like I would another person. I started sharing my struggles, fears, and plans with God. I thanked Him, asked His advice and opinion, and I even questioned Him. What was important was that I stopped lying to God and told Him the truth. The amazing thing is that the more honest I was with Him, the more I trusted Him, and the more peace I felt. Prayer wasn’t about earning His approval anymore, it was about connection. I discovered God wasn’t waiting for me to get it right; He was waiting for me to get real.

Prayer:
Father, thank You for accepting me right where I am. Thank You that I don’t have to perform or pretend to earn Your love. Teach me to keep coming to You honestly, without fear or shame. Help me to grow in our conversation and to stay open to Your voice every day. Amen.

Recovery On the Go

God speaks in quiet moments, even behind the steering wheel.

Your ears will hear a command behind you saying, “This is the way. Walk in it.” Isaiah 30:21

Yesterday I had an early morning doctor appointment, and it threw off my whole rhythm. I had to leave the house much earlier than normal, which meant no time for my regular routine. Every morning I grab a cup of coffee, sit in my chair, read, pray, meditate, and get centered. It is my anchor. When I realized I would not have time for any of that, I was frustrated. I had not even thought about how this appointment would affect my morning ritual. I rushed to get ready and headed out the door with my mind still irritated.

As I drove, I felt God prompting me with a question, why was I so bothered and upset by this? I said to myself it was because I missed my devotion time, but inwardly I knew there was something deeper, there always is. As I got quiet, I saw it. It was control and insecurity. My routine helps me feel safe and grounded. Then another new thought came to me. Why not have my “me” time right now while driving? I could not read, but I could still pray. I could still meditate. I could still think about how to live the principles today. That simple shift opened up something new in me. I realized I do not have to be tied to a specific ritual for it to count. I can connect with God and focus on my recovery anywhere, anytime. These tools travel with me. My spiritual life is not limited to one chair and one timeframe.

By the time I reached the appointment, I felt great. I was more centered than when I left the house. I gave myself grace and remembered something important; I have a program. The program does not have me. Routines may help me, but they do not own me. Missing one reading does not mean I failed. It simply means I get to practice flexibility and trust that God meets me wherever I am. If I want, I can always read later. When I am flexible and embrace new ideas, I am learning and growing. I am improving my conscious contact with God. It is when I connect with Him and not a routine that I truly feel safe.

Prayer:

Father, thank You that my recovery tools travel with me. Help me stay flexible and open so I can connect with You anywhere and in any moment. Teach me to trust You more than my routines, and remind me that You always meet me right where I am.